Segment · Portfolio Diagnostics
AM I DEGENIFIED?
Drop a wallet. The AI host runs a fully unscientific portfolio review and prints a verdict. The verdict is rude.
Chain
Solana addresses get a real on-chain scan (SOL + SPL balances, priced via Jupiter). Ethereum 0x… addresses are scanned for ETH + ERC-20 balances with live USD pricing. Robinhood Chain reads native balances and activity. Anything else falls back to deterministic parody.
Try:
Live Telemetry8 scans · last 60savg DGN 42 · DEGENIFIED
Scans · last 60s
8
rolling
Avg degen
61
last 20
Most degenified · 5min
DGN 6865Janky Roastmaster's-Lunch #4460
4qnm…2yC1 · $193
MOG81%SOL10%USDC8%POPCAT1%
Top degen score · 5min
73Soft-Handed MEV-Snack #6568
G7pK…2KEK · $778
Trending in wallets · 5min
BONK
$25.1K×3
MEW
$9.1K×1
MOTHER
$8.3K×1
PNUT
$7.5K×2
POPCAT
$395×2
Live tier distribution
boomer 0civilian 2trader 3degen 3terminal 0
Synthetic stream · hover to pause · click row to expand · holdings are parody
Diagnoses are randomized parody — not real on-chain analysis, not financial advice, not even particularly nice. · Parody · Not financial advice · Full disclaimer